undisclosed

"Of the many contradictions that exist in the world, the contrast between love and hate is perhaps the starkest. It is one that helps us value true love while understanding the ramifications of hatred."
desires

"A life without love is like a sunless garden when the flowers are dead. The consciousness of loving and being loved brings a warmth and richness to life that nothing else can bring."
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Sunday, January 11

tomorrow is the BIG day for all 17 year olds and 18 year olds.
surprisingly, im not nervous for now. maybe i will be a nervous wreck tomorrow. maybe i will freak out tomorrow. for which there will be a 99.9999999999999999999999999% of those two situations happening in the school hall. i shouldnt even put the word "maybe".
but whatever. im not here today to talk about my feelings on the day before the release of Os results.

it is just...what happens tomorrow depends on whether this will be my last. i just cant face my future of taunts and critisism if my results turn out to be a total flop. im sick of having contrasting thoughts at the same time: one which sees me happy on the stage, and one which sees me falling from a building. i admit im just not brave enough to move on if my results are bad, for i will not trust confidence ever again. this is the last test to tell if my confidence level can come true for me for once. so...whatever happens tomorrow, there can only be two outcomes:
1) im safe and sound, happily blogging here.
2) seeing me in newspaper on tuesday.
whatever. i dont care anymore. either i get on with my life happily, or i'll just end my life. it is as simple as that. goodbye for now. or forever~