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"Of the many contradictions that exist in the world, the contrast between love and hate is perhaps the starkest. It is one that helps us value true love while understanding the ramifications of hatred."
desires

"A life without love is like a sunless garden when the flowers are dead. The consciousness of loving and being loved brings a warmth and richness to life that nothing else can bring."
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Sunday, October 28

this new blogskin of mine is going to remind me that i just have to let go. i will only change this blogskin once my feelings for him have all disappeared.

well, friday was the last day of the sch year, and tis is the first year i have ended it in such low spirits. the word of the day is JEALOUSLY. i feel that im letting so many people down by not forgetting. cs, mardiana etc are telling me to let go, even though it is hard. but i just cant believe it can be this hard. where is my conscious? is forgetting that difficult?
and the way he treats her now...i have mixed feelings? wad he has told me during that brief period is so different from the way he treats her now. why can love be so contradicting??? LOVE is easy to get but hard to remove it from your soul.
so had fun on friday afternoon though, practising the dance for scouts campfire...
yesterday...SCOUTS CAMPFIRE WAS WAY FUN!!! felt that our performance was the best among all!!! but got loads of saboing going on, especially between scouts and redcross >.<
nightwalk...not exactly fun at my station, but heard backstage was a scary one. i put the facial mask the scouts not scared de LOL. chang hong did a gud job though...then so scary, kt's twin sisters cry lor. is like chang hong told me got one of my juniors cry, then i tot is fake de then really later on summore came into the D&T toilet to tell me sumone crying. i went out only to find kai wen crying. she kena scared at the backstage, the station after mine. so comforted her then went to 3s5 to let her watch movie. then i just returned to the toilet when i heard crying again. this time is kai hui. she went past leanna's station (the station b4 mine), then scared like hell le. so companied her to 3s5 lor.
later on during supper i told them wad happened at my station then they laughing like hell, especially about wad shi yuan did at our station lor. chang hong wrote " let's play a game of poke the doors" and wad she do? she go and SLAM OPENED the doors! LOL! too bad she nvr see me though. chang hong summore tell me is not he scare her is she scare him seh HAHA(:
bedtime...okay so i stayed up for nearly the whole nite looking after them, luckily sumtimes zhi qian sir took over me so still able to catch a few 40 winks. dead tired cos they keep waking up in the middle of the nite becos of the nitewalk they too scared to sleep...
so tis morning dismissed them then we went to eat roti prata for breakfast(:
still dead beat and tired, but i still have maths and proposal to do, ciaos(:

and i dun wanna see HIS tagboard ever again, cos im afraid of seeing wrong things which will hurt me even more.